My friend joined me this week. She supplied the chocolate and Wasabi flavored seaweed. (please don't try this at home) and we settled in for some laughs. It wasn't long before I was smiling so hard my cheeks hurt and this was before we even started the show. She just cracks me up.
This week was full of drama, which included the dreaded two on one date, a one on one date with Doug, a group date, and a new villain who has emerged complete with ominous music. Emily was sweet as usual and I am finding some of the men even a little charming.
The show began with a bro fight between Arie and Doug. Arie was teasing Doug about his upcoming date with Emily. The tension began to build but was quickly dissipated by the entrance of beautiful Emily. She grabbed Doug's hand, left the hotel, and they began to wander the streets of Bahamas. Doug smiled and continued to put his best foot forward by talking about his charity, his kid, and his awesomeness only until Emily told him " You are too good to be true, I want you to get real with me."
He still hesitated to open up. This is when I made the connection between him and the Bachelor Brad. I told my friend. " He reminds me of Brad" only to be echoed by Emily moments later " You remind me of Brad." I was impressed by my psychic abilities, which may or may not have been a side effect of the wasabi flavored seaweed. Although Emily is still unsure about Doug she liked him enough to give him the rose. My opinion about Doug definitely was a little more positive this show, but if he doesn't get real and show some of his weaknesses then she is going to lose interest.
Emily then ventured to some caves with Wolf and Hot Accountant. The conversation was almost dead silent as they sat at a table among stalagmites and stalactites. Luckily just as we were losing interest, Emily seized the hot accountant and brought him to the corner for a heart to heart talk. He began to tell her about how awesome his life was, how awesome his friends and family are to the point that he was tearing up. Emily stood there awkwardly because she is uncomfortable seeing a man cry. Plus she was probably thinking" If your life is so great. Why do you need me?" He is sweet and he would probably be the type of guy I would date,(not saying that David is a cry baby) but he played this conversation all wrong. It should have been filled with interesting questions he was asking her instead of trying to prove how great he is.
Before the men are on the Bacholorette there should be a recommended reading list with titles such at Men are from Mars Women are from Venus, How to Win Friends and Influence People, and He/She is Just Not That into You. This may help prevent moments like this where the men are so clueless it is almost painful to watch.
After Emily talked to the hot accountant she talked to Wolfe. We didn't hear this conversation, but he must have said something right because she gave the rose to Wolfe man. I know shocking. I almost gasped as I watched her turn down the Hottie, but as I look back I am not surprised because Emily likes damaged manly men and the Accountant was too perfect for her.
The group date included some sort of sailing challenge between team A and Team B. My friend and I got stuck in some side conversation something about growing marijuana in the closet (I know completely random and don't worry reader it was neither me or her that have tried this), so this part of the show was a little fuzzy. Anyways the next part I remember is that there were some men crying on a bus (They must have lost ) I hope that Emily doesn't see any of this footage because she would probably have sent the whole bus a packin' She gave the rose to the guy from Salt Lake. Which was a good move because she hasn't been on a one on one date with him, but I can tell that she is into him.
At the final rose ceremony, the fitness trainer, who has now received the new villain role, made his snarky remarks that were barely coherent something about him coming on this show to become the next bachelor. In my same washabi induced state I think I could actually hear him thinking with his peanut sized brain "first bachelor and then the world" followed by an evil laugh. However, when my friend mentioned that Chris Harrison, the host, is getting a divorce we couldn't help but think maybe he will be the next bachelor or maybe he will confess his dying love for Emily wouldn't that be a legendary turn of events. Emily handed the roses out and sent home two men tonight. The guy with long hair and Charlie. See you later! I can't wait for next week. This time my friend is hosting and I will be sure to bring the Wasabi Flavored Seaweed.
