My friend joined me this week. She supplied the chocolate and Wasabi flavored seaweed. (please don't try this at home) and we settled in for some laughs. It wasn't long before I was smiling so hard my cheeks hurt and this was before we even started the show. She just cracks me up.
This week was full of drama, which included the dreaded two on one date, a one on one date with Doug, a group date, and a new villain who has emerged complete with ominous music. Emily was sweet as usual and I am finding some of the men even a little charming.
The show began with a bro fight between Arie and Doug. Arie was teasing Doug about his upcoming date with Emily. The tension began to build but was quickly dissipated by the entrance of beautiful Emily. She grabbed Doug's hand, left the hotel, and they began to wander the streets of Bahamas. Doug smiled and continued to put his best foot forward by talking about his charity, his kid, and his awesomeness only until Emily told him " You are too good to be true, I want you to get real with me."
He still hesitated to open up. This is when I made the connection between him and the Bachelor Brad. I told my friend. " He reminds me of Brad" only to be echoed by Emily moments later " You remind me of Brad." I was impressed by my psychic abilities, which may or may not have been a side effect of the wasabi flavored seaweed. Although Emily is still unsure about Doug she liked him enough to give him the rose. My opinion about Doug definitely was a little more positive this show, but if he doesn't get real and show some of his weaknesses then she is going to lose interest.
Emily then ventured to some caves with Wolf and Hot Accountant. The conversation was almost dead silent as they sat at a table among stalagmites and stalactites. Luckily just as we were losing interest, Emily seized the hot accountant and brought him to the corner for a heart to heart talk. He began to tell her about how awesome his life was, how awesome his friends and family are to the point that he was tearing up. Emily stood there awkwardly because she is uncomfortable seeing a man cry. Plus she was probably thinking" If your life is so great. Why do you need me?" He is sweet and he would probably be the type of guy I would date,(not saying that David is a cry baby) but he played this conversation all wrong. It should have been filled with interesting questions he was asking her instead of trying to prove how great he is.
Before the men are on the Bacholorette there should be a recommended reading list with titles such at Men are from Mars Women are from Venus, How to Win Friends and Influence People, and He/She is Just Not That into You. This may help prevent moments like this where the men are so clueless it is almost painful to watch.
After Emily talked to the hot accountant she talked to Wolfe. We didn't hear this conversation, but he must have said something right because she gave the rose to Wolfe man. I know shocking. I almost gasped as I watched her turn down the Hottie, but as I look back I am not surprised because Emily likes damaged manly men and the Accountant was too perfect for her.
The group date included some sort of sailing challenge between team A and Team B. My friend and I got stuck in some side conversation something about growing marijuana in the closet (I know completely random and don't worry reader it was neither me or her that have tried this), so this part of the show was a little fuzzy. Anyways the next part I remember is that there were some men crying on a bus (They must have lost ) I hope that Emily doesn't see any of this footage because she would probably have sent the whole bus a packin' She gave the rose to the guy from Salt Lake. Which was a good move because she hasn't been on a one on one date with him, but I can tell that she is into him.
At the final rose ceremony, the fitness trainer, who has now received the new villain role, made his snarky remarks that were barely coherent something about him coming on this show to become the next bachelor. In my same washabi induced state I think I could actually hear him thinking with his peanut sized brain "first bachelor and then the world" followed by an evil laugh. However, when my friend mentioned that Chris Harrison, the host, is getting a divorce we couldn't help but think maybe he will be the next bachelor or maybe he will confess his dying love for Emily wouldn't that be a legendary turn of events. Emily handed the roses out and sent home two men tonight. The guy with long hair and Charlie. See you later! I can't wait for next week. This time my friend is hosting and I will be sure to bring the Wasabi Flavored Seaweed.
Tuesday, June 5, 2012
Wednesday, May 30, 2012
Third Show
Due to Memorial Day weekend this Bachelorette viewing consisted of me and my snarky comments that I made to the television as I watched the show. I enjoyed my company though and I caught myself laughing a few times over my witty remarks.
The show was on Monday and now it is Wednesday, so I have had time to really gather my thoughts on everything that is happening to poor Emily and this delayed post really puts perspective on what was really important. Anyways now to the good stuff.
Emily's first date was with "creepy eye guy" . They walked up the side of a building to have dinner (definitely not as cool as walking up the bay bridge) and then they watched a concert with some country star. Emily was a little concerned because he was younger than her, but what really concerned me is the strange, fake vibe that I get from this guy. I can't explain it, but he just seems like he is trying too hard to impress her or maybe he is really a creep trying to play nice. I am not sure, but he is not one of my favorites. Of course I try not to jump to any conclusions because maybe he is a really nice guy and he is nervous about the cameras. Who knows, but this is just my gut reaction.
The second date was a group date. She took the men to the park where they were questioned by her friends then forced to play with kids and pretend they were having fun. The fitness guy made some comment about hoping that Emily didn't get fat which he said in front of her friends. (really??, What an idiot). The friends all liked a guy with blond hair. He seems like he is nice enough. She ended up listening to her friends and giving the rose to him. Emily sent home the lumber jack during the date because he missed his kid. She just wasn't that into him and maybe it really made her uncomfortable to see a grown man cry like a baby.
The last date was a one on one with Arie (the racecar driver) They went to Dollywood and then Dolly Parton put on a short concert for them. It was sweet and Emily was so excited to meet Dolly and I am still trying to figure out how Dolly can play her guitar with fake nails. I am sure Arie was thinking that he was lucky to be there too because he knows that anytime Emily thinks about meeting Dolly she will think about him too.
At the final rose ceremony, Emily had a strange conversation with Alessandro, who's occupation is Grain Merchant which really is code for migrant worker. He told her because she had a child marrying her would be a compromise for him. There was also some interesting facts about him that came out when the show was over like he was dating his cousin and his one night stands. Anyways he had to go immediately. When she got to handing out the roses she only had to eliminate one suitor. Sorry Stevie! I guess it is time to pack your bags You were just too jersey shore for this southern girl. Can't wait for next week.
The show was on Monday and now it is Wednesday, so I have had time to really gather my thoughts on everything that is happening to poor Emily and this delayed post really puts perspective on what was really important. Anyways now to the good stuff.
Emily's first date was with "creepy eye guy" . They walked up the side of a building to have dinner (definitely not as cool as walking up the bay bridge) and then they watched a concert with some country star. Emily was a little concerned because he was younger than her, but what really concerned me is the strange, fake vibe that I get from this guy. I can't explain it, but he just seems like he is trying too hard to impress her or maybe he is really a creep trying to play nice. I am not sure, but he is not one of my favorites. Of course I try not to jump to any conclusions because maybe he is a really nice guy and he is nervous about the cameras. Who knows, but this is just my gut reaction.
The second date was a group date. She took the men to the park where they were questioned by her friends then forced to play with kids and pretend they were having fun. The fitness guy made some comment about hoping that Emily didn't get fat which he said in front of her friends. (really??, What an idiot). The friends all liked a guy with blond hair. He seems like he is nice enough. She ended up listening to her friends and giving the rose to him. Emily sent home the lumber jack during the date because he missed his kid. She just wasn't that into him and maybe it really made her uncomfortable to see a grown man cry like a baby.
The last date was a one on one with Arie (the racecar driver) They went to Dollywood and then Dolly Parton put on a short concert for them. It was sweet and Emily was so excited to meet Dolly and I am still trying to figure out how Dolly can play her guitar with fake nails. I am sure Arie was thinking that he was lucky to be there too because he knows that anytime Emily thinks about meeting Dolly she will think about him too.
At the final rose ceremony, Emily had a strange conversation with Alessandro, who's occupation is Grain Merchant which really is code for migrant worker. He told her because she had a child marrying her would be a compromise for him. There was also some interesting facts about him that came out when the show was over like he was dating his cousin and his one night stands. Anyways he had to go immediately. When she got to handing out the roses she only had to eliminate one suitor. Sorry Stevie! I guess it is time to pack your bags You were just too jersey shore for this southern girl. Can't wait for next week.
Tuesday, May 22, 2012
Second Show
Our Bachelorette group doubled in attendance this week and if you count the texts from our friend, who was in San Diego, and my brother in law's text which simply read, "NOOOOO StevIE" it has already tripled in size. After some snacks and Crystal Light we all cuddled up on the couch to follow Emily on her journey to find "the one."
The first one on one date Emily chose the personal trainer with tan skin, biceps the size of cantalope, (I'd like to squeeze those), and perfectly straight, bleached teeth. His hair was carefully fuzzed up and held strategically in place with gel to cover up places where it is starting to thin out, but this imperfection is endearing because it makes him seem attainable.
Emily and him made cookies at her house for her daughter's soccer game. The conversation of course was boring, but they made a ridiculously gorgeous couple. After they dropped the cookies off it was time for the real date to begin. It must have been uneventful because I can't even remember any of the details, but I think that Emily had a fabulous dress on. She gave him the rose, but their conversation was overshadowed by the fact that we were all so intrigued by how she got the rose to stay on his shirt without using a pin. Is it magnetic?
After she dropped her personal trainer off at the mansion, Emily went home to get a good night sleep in preparation for the first group date. The next day she along with a slew of men performed a play with the Muppets, this part of the show dragged on forever. As one of the contestants put it ".. at least Kermit is funny." because the men were all equally boring and lame.
This is when one of my girlfriends made the statement we were all thinking, " I think reality TV has run out of quality men. " We couldn't help but agree. Each season the men seem to get a little less attractive, a little less educated, and a little less charming. There were several interesting job titles like mushroom farmer, log trader, and luxury consultant. Along with aspiring singer/songwriter, entrepreneur, and other creative labels for unemployed. I am surprised that there is not a bigger pool of men to choose from. Emily gave the rose to the the skateboarder from Utah. Who we are cheering for just because he is from Utah.
The last date was a one on one with Joe. She brought him to a hotel she visited as a child. At dinner she asked him serious questions about his/their future. He failed to include key words such as babies, family, marriage. The date ended with her walking him to the car without rose. See you Joe!
A few more men were booted off last night the only one who was slightly interesting was the biology teacher. Can't wait for next week.
The first one on one date Emily chose the personal trainer with tan skin, biceps the size of cantalope, (I'd like to squeeze those), and perfectly straight, bleached teeth. His hair was carefully fuzzed up and held strategically in place with gel to cover up places where it is starting to thin out, but this imperfection is endearing because it makes him seem attainable.
Emily and him made cookies at her house for her daughter's soccer game. The conversation of course was boring, but they made a ridiculously gorgeous couple. After they dropped the cookies off it was time for the real date to begin. It must have been uneventful because I can't even remember any of the details, but I think that Emily had a fabulous dress on. She gave him the rose, but their conversation was overshadowed by the fact that we were all so intrigued by how she got the rose to stay on his shirt without using a pin. Is it magnetic?
After she dropped her personal trainer off at the mansion, Emily went home to get a good night sleep in preparation for the first group date. The next day she along with a slew of men performed a play with the Muppets, this part of the show dragged on forever. As one of the contestants put it ".. at least Kermit is funny." because the men were all equally boring and lame.
This is when one of my girlfriends made the statement we were all thinking, " I think reality TV has run out of quality men. " We couldn't help but agree. Each season the men seem to get a little less attractive, a little less educated, and a little less charming. There were several interesting job titles like mushroom farmer, log trader, and luxury consultant. Along with aspiring singer/songwriter, entrepreneur, and other creative labels for unemployed. I am surprised that there is not a bigger pool of men to choose from. Emily gave the rose to the the skateboarder from Utah. Who we are cheering for just because he is from Utah.
The last date was a one on one with Joe. She brought him to a hotel she visited as a child. At dinner she asked him serious questions about his/their future. He failed to include key words such as babies, family, marriage. The date ended with her walking him to the car without rose. See you Joe!
A few more men were booted off last night the only one who was slightly interesting was the biology teacher. Can't wait for next week.
Tuesday, May 15, 2012
Bachelorette Premier
So in case you missed last night's premier, here is what happened. Emily brought her southern charm on and most of the men were pretty lame. Sadly, my friend and I decided out of the 25 only about five or six were even worth her time, but isn't that how it always is.
One man flew in on an helicopter. Emily didn't seem impressed and his ostentatious entrance made him a target for mud slinging comments from all the other suitors. Of course the bacehlor francise capitalized on these bro fights by adding dramatic music; however, the green shirt guy that was mainly picking fights with the helicopter dude, was pretty lame and his insults lacked creativity. (don't know their names yet)
Emily gave her first impression rose to a man who had his son write a letter to her. It was sweet, but also a little sappy for my taste; however, when you only have a few minutes to make an impression it was obviously a good move on his part.
In the end she eliminated five men, who cried and whined about how there is no one out there for them (Blah, Blah, Blah) and one ripped off his shirt to show what she was missing (yummy!) Sadly this rose ceremony was kind of boring and there were not as many crazies and bro fights as I was hoping for. Luckily the season looks like it is full of drama and I am hoping Emily finds someone worthy of her.
One man flew in on an helicopter. Emily didn't seem impressed and his ostentatious entrance made him a target for mud slinging comments from all the other suitors. Of course the bacehlor francise capitalized on these bro fights by adding dramatic music; however, the green shirt guy that was mainly picking fights with the helicopter dude, was pretty lame and his insults lacked creativity. (don't know their names yet)
Emily gave her first impression rose to a man who had his son write a letter to her. It was sweet, but also a little sappy for my taste; however, when you only have a few minutes to make an impression it was obviously a good move on his part.
In the end she eliminated five men, who cried and whined about how there is no one out there for them (Blah, Blah, Blah) and one ripped off his shirt to show what she was missing (yummy!) Sadly this rose ceremony was kind of boring and there were not as many crazies and bro fights as I was hoping for. Luckily the season looks like it is full of drama and I am hoping Emily finds someone worthy of her.
Sunday, May 13, 2012
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